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Blog Chalk
India, Female, 22, live on tonnes of books, lots of music, much more hope, some incoherent philosophising, and swear by Ayn Rand and Pink Floyd. Very stubborn and don't want to change. Trying very hard to become an engineer. In love with life... And Newton :)

Small Talk

Life in archives
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005

Blog Truths
"Can I be as I believe myself or as others believe me to be? Here is where these lines become a confession in the presence of my unknown and unknowable me, unknown and unknowable for myself. Here is where I create the legend where I must bury myself."
--Miguel De Unamuno.

Current read

Linking Park
Paperbacks: Love And Longing In Bombay -Vikram Chandra, Eleven Minutes -Paulo Coelho (Still trying! Can't get past the S&M bit. THE BOOK SUCKS!)
E-books: Da Vinci Code -Dan Brown

Thank ye!

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Tuesday, July 06, 2004
This And That

I'm back to the grind... And how!!! Attended college after a year. And it wasn't as bad as I'd expected it to be. And after the first day itself, I have sheets and sheeeets and sheeeeets of write ups to complete, I need to rearrange the room, I need to buy books. And I soooo need to sleep after two sleepless nights I spent in the train trying to protect the airbag that had my motherboard in it. My life!!

I'm back to a place I am on the verge of hating... But then again, it's good to be back to a place where I've learnt my most important lessons in life...

I'm back with my Babe roomie... And the new one is an Auntie who's out to prove she's a babe... But then again, I think they're pretty decent people to live with.

I'm attending a class where 50% of the crowd consistss of people who were once my juniors... But then again, half of my class consistes of people who got YDs with me. :D

The new faculty members are very hard to please... But then again, they are awesome teachers!

The old faculty members are AAARGH! But then again, they still love me and they are responsible for the term work marks!

My class is pretty dumb, the highest last sem was a measly 61%... Do I have to tell you what the good thing here is?? B-)

Since college has started in full swing, blogging will have to take a backseat now. But then again, I'm going to top my class this semester! B-)

So excuse me while I gloat... I'll see you around sometime. :)

Thursday, July 01, 2004
Hypocrisy Unleashed

I will be leaving for Pune in 3 days time, and it's time again for me to visit my innumerous relatives back home, and listen to their gibberish about "sushil ladkiyan, shaadi-byaah" and the likes.

After a lot of nagging I finally agreed to go to my aunt's place. Now I am not the usual bhale ghar ki ladki who cooks like a 5 star chef, keeps the house spic and span and doesn't think of talking to "paraye mard". Needless to add I'm not the favourite child in my father's side of the family. Here's the conversation that took place there.

Me: Pranaam Bua, kaise ho aap?

Aunt: Khush raho. Bahut dubli ho gayi ho.

(I already had the "yeah right" expression on my face. The sole reason why my aunt wanted me to lose weight at one point in time was so that she could find a suitable bakra for me.)

Me: Kahaan bua, I still have to lose a lot.

Aunt: Haan bhai... Aajkal ladkon ko dubli patli ladkiyan hi pasand aati hai.

(I stared at ma long and hard for having brought me here. Mom was grinning. She'd given up on such people long back. And they had probably given up on mom too. So I was at the receiving end now.)

Me: Arre bua, life mein shaadi se zyaada bahut kuch hai.

Aunt: (obviously flabbergasted, and making an obvious effort to hide it) Haan padhai likhai to zaroori hai. Tab aur kitne saal ki padhai hai?

Me: (in the mood to irritate her): 2 saal engineering ke, 2 saal MBA ke, 1-2 saal phd ke (I cooked that up, I'm dying to earn money as soon as possible!). Uske baad dekhte hain.

Aunt: (a minute away from heart attack) Shaadi nahii karni hai kya?

Me: Arre uske baad ho jaayegi shaadi. Aur nahii hui toh kya farak parta hai?

Aunt: Suno beta, itna hawa mein mat udo. Kaam seekh rahii ho kuch ghar ka?

Me: Nahii bua, time nahii milta hai. (By now I was in the mood to make my fury as obvious as I could dare to in the presence of Mamma dearest.)

Aunt: (to mom): Bhabhi aap kuch soch rahii hain iske liye?

Mom: Vimla ji abhi to bahut time hai. Apne pair pe khadi ho jaaye pehle.

Aunt: Paise ki kami hai aaplogon ko bhabhi ki aap itna soch rahii hain?

NOW I WANTED TO SCREAM. I knew what I wanted to say to her now, and was waiting for my turn. Mom just gave her usual mute expression, which screams out loud that she doesn't want to carry on with the conversation any further. She left the rooma nd went to see my aunt's mom in law in the other room. Now I knew I had exactly 5 minutes to put a final stop to this conversation.

Aunt: (to me now) Suno beta, agar koi khud se khoj li ho toh mat sochna ki yeh sab ho sakta hai. Humlogon ki be-izzati karaogi shakaldipi (that's apparantly the subcaste) brahmin samaaj mein?

Me: (like the very sweet poison I can be at times) Bua, bada ajiib samaaj hai aaplogon ka. Jab ghar ke bete 27-28 years tak ghar pe baith ke ma-baap ko bewakoof banate hain, aur paise kamaane ka naam bhi nahii lete, toh koi be-izzati nahii hoti samaaj mein?

For someone whose 27-28 year old sons are doing just that, it was a huge blow. She changed the topic of conversation almost immediately after this. And I know these people are going to talk a lot of crap about me after this incident. But like WHO CARES!

On my way back I got a loooong lecture from mom.. Yeah I'm a fool. Ii can't hide a thing form her! "Itna gussa think nahii", "If we support you why do you need to bother about people who don't know what the world is all about?", "What's the difference between then and you now?". I agree with mom. Maybe sometimes expressing disagreement with that mute expression that's so typical of Ma is much better than screaming out loud what I feel. But there's a limit to one's tolerance.

How hypocritical can the society get? Why do we have different rules for boys and girls? And these harbingers of the society... I wonder why they don't see what's happening in their homes before interfering in the lives of other people. Thank God for my Mom's side of the family. And thank God for my parents. I would have lost the remaining amount of sanity long ago if it wasn't for them

I don't know if I ever want to see this aunt of mine again. I'm sure she doesn't want to look at my face again. Thank God for little mercies!