ebony
ivory
I see the world in black and white...

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Blog Chalk
India, Female, 22, live on tonnes of books, lots of music, much more hope, some incoherent philosophising, and swear by Ayn Rand and Pink Floyd. Very stubborn and don't want to change. Trying very hard to become an engineer. In love with life... And Newton :)

Small Talk

Life in archives
04/01/2004 - 05/01/2004
05/01/2004 - 06/01/2004
06/01/2004 - 07/01/2004
07/01/2004 - 08/01/2004
08/01/2004 - 09/01/2004
09/01/2004 - 10/01/2004
10/01/2004 - 11/01/2004
11/01/2004 - 12/01/2004
12/01/2004 - 01/01/2005
01/01/2005 - 02/01/2005
02/01/2005 - 03/01/2005
03/01/2005 - 04/01/2005
04/01/2005 - 05/01/2005

Blog Truths
"Can I be as I believe myself or as others believe me to be? Here is where these lines become a confession in the presence of my unknown and unknowable me, unknown and unknowable for myself. Here is where I create the legend where I must bury myself."
--Miguel De Unamuno.

Current read

Linking Park
Book-A-Minute
Paperbacks: Love And Longing In Bombay -Vikram Chandra, Eleven Minutes -Paulo Coelho (Still trying! Can't get past the S&M bit. THE BOOK SUCKS!)
E-books: Da Vinci Code -Dan Brown


Thank ye!

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Sunday, March 27, 2005

Holi was fun. Colours, eggs, screaming, water park, dancing around, mild flirtations, bhaang, vodka, amazing food... The works! And the Indian Ocean concert on Sunday night was the icing on the cake. Now that is the stuff REAL music is made of. Can't say it enough. :)

But somehow the disconnection has stayed. And my headache, bad throat, and the scorching heat aren't helping much either.

Have you ever felt the loneliness creep into every single pore of your skin? Ever found the sounds of silence deafening? Suddenly nothing makes sense anymore... I know it's just a passing phase. But it sure doesn't feel good. Like Yoss put it, it feels like everyone around is deaf only to me.

It's strange how for once I'm fervently wishing my words and actions weren't being taken so seriously. Freedom can be confused with licence, resilience with indifference, fun with frivolousness... Just one of those things that are wrong with my world. Whatever happened to the theory of "to each his own"?

Ok, got it out of my system finally! Funny how one changes over years. Two years back in a situation like this, I would have most probably given up just to "fit in". If not that, it would definitely have taken more than just one session of being honest to myself for me to get over it. Now all it takes it one cathartic session of self realisation. And that's all that matters I guess. To hell with the phases of disconnection, it is after all a phase... Life goes on. :)